Sunday, November 24, 2019

Cellphone Rant essays

Cellphone Rant essays My Hell is a stadium of 20,000+ people in which everyone has a cell phone... Here's why. Say I'm walking down the street. Someone's cell phone happens to go off and thirty-five people all pat themselves down like they are on fire. To boot, the ring tone is nothing but an eardrum-shattering sonic boom of a cute, yet inaccurate version, of the latest pop molasses released for the mindless sheep we call mainstream radio listeners, It seems that the world renowned pocket communicator has swept the world is such a way that even children not a day over twelve feel the need to call their friends on a cell phone that has been so lovingly bestowed upon them by their materialistic and quite egotistical parents with morals that need to have a serious reality check. Who has the money for 600,000 anytime, anywhere, free-night-and-weekend minutes to shell out on a sixteen year old? Not I, yet there are some out there that suffer from gotta-buy-a-cell-phone-cause-my-son/daughter-might-not-look-cool-enough syndrome. Why do we succumb the beckoning to annoy the not-so-innocent public with the insatiable urge to raise our voices to that high level reserved for Jerry Springer guests and Televangelists into the receiver your receptionless handset just so that the probably nonlistening party on the other end can hear all about the size, color, and frequency of the contagious blue fungus on your teeth, or some other too-hot-for-TV topic. Do me a favor and use the cell phone for what it was meant to be, an emergency device. Not a release for an impulse to ask your buddies whats going on during second period when you know they are either sitting in class or they're ditching to go mud-riding with all their redneck compadres in one's dad's military-class war machine with a four-foot lift kit and pipes that sound like gun-shots that you wouldn't be able hear over ...

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